Warum München so porno ist (Why Munich is so awesome)

Yes the title of this post you are reading is real. Porno in the Umgangsprache (slang) these days means awesome. How do words such as these come about in language? I'm going to think about that question for a while. Well here goes the list for München moments (which incidentally I made for Beijing back on July 12th of last year. Again I will update this later in the semester:

1. The ridiculous amount of cafes - They are literally everywhere and filled from opening to closing. It makes you question if people actually work in this city. Leopoldstraße in Schwabing is a good place to go if you want to find a cafe as the sidewalks are barely wide enough for people to pass through. I think München is one of the few places in the world that has extra wide sidewalks so that cafes can set up on it.


2. Schick Haarschnitte (Stylish Haircuts) - Well I had first hand experience with this the other day when I got a hair cut. My hair was transformed for a moment into a jell-infused rock star. For some reason the guy cutting my hair would not let me tell him how to cut my hair. He went on about how it can only be this way to look good. Haha. Other than this first-hand experience, München is a pretty good place to go if you want to see some crazy haircuts. I have seen thus far anything from mohawks to spiked hair to everything else really.


3. Bier everywhere and anytime, including in the StuSta - Although this is true througout Germany, München takes it to another level. In the StuStadt there are bars in every building and everyday for one hour the Getränkverkauf (drink store) opens and sells kiste (crates) of bier. In the Innenstadt (downtown), all of the München Beers are represented and have there own Biergarten and restaurant. In the Englisher Garten there are at least 5, one about 10 minutes from the StuStadt. Otherwise, Biergärten are everywhere in the city, in every part.


4. FKK - Oh FKK. This acronym stands for Freie Körper Kultur or in Englisch something like Freeing Your Body Culture which really means loving to be naked all the time. This peculiar "kultur" is readily found in the English Garden. Yes people just walk around in the nude...it is a good thing that I haven't seen this yet (I guess I must be walking through the safe areas.)


5. Bayerisch! - Servus! Oh Bayerisch. This is an unintelligible dialect only spoken in Bayern. There is a reason why people say that Bayern is not really Germany! Haha. It is amazing that the German language can be spoken in such a crazy accent that people from northern Germany can't understand it. I certainly never will.


6. Echte Schallplatten Läden + Cool Music Venues - There are real record stores in München, some with lots of turntables in the middle of the store so that you can preview any record you like. I feel like you just can't find places like that in the US. And the music venues here in München are definitely above average. My favorite place so far is a place called "Die Registrateur" which is inside a huge building with lots of offices. The venue itself seems to be in a former conference room, but the stage is tiny and the atmosphere is great. Bands actually have to walk through the crowd to get to the stage.



7. Wearing around Tracht in Everyday Life - I'm sure you have seen the bayerische "tracht" before (traditional clothing), for example Lederhosen, Dirndls, and hunting gear. Common sense would say that tracht is just for holidays and tourists, but in reality they are not...tracht is worn all the time. I see people all the time in the English Garden walking around in Lederhosen and Dirndls, and the other day while I was walking on the U-Bahn platform I saw a man coming off the train dressed in a full hunter's uniform, complete with a long feather sticking out of his green hat. Also no ones stares at you if you happen to be wearing Tracht because it is so common.



8. Fleich + Auszogne + Viktualienmarkt (Meat+"Undressed pastries"+Victuals Market) - The Viktualienmarkt is the butcher mecca of München. Müncheners sure love there Fleich here and go to the market to find their favorite butcher shop. Then they can go and grab a Auszogne, which is a doughnut but more flat with less substance. The Auszognes can also be found at certain cafes and the Chinesischer Turm (Chinese Pagoda). Although its touristy, the Viktualienmarkt that is, it's nice to walk around and take in the scene.



9. Teuer, Teuer, Teuer (Expensive x 3) - München is really really expensive. There's really no way around it with the Euro and all, but München is definitely one, if not the most expensive place in Germany. After a while, you start to think that certain things are cheap when you know that in the US it would be half the price. It's scary. But there are things to do here without spending money or very little, that would be relaxing in the Englischer Garten and going to museums on Sundays.



10. Fußball Fans on the U-Bahn (Soccer Fans) - I love Fußball Fans. My first day here I ran into a bunch on the U-Bahn and they were singing songs and throwing out insults of the other team's players.



11. Millions of restaurants that are always filled - Whenever you walk into a restaurant it is filled with people! And there are restaurants everywhere. So this logic doesn't make much sense or people just go out a lot.



12. Meeting people from Tunisia and Georgia - München is an international city. There are people here from South America, Africa, Eastern Europe, everywhere. And what allows us to communicate? German more often than not.



13. Super efficient transport system and Olympiapark - The U-Bahn and S-Bahn system in München is flawless. It is usually on time and the cars are always clean. They are also putting in more and more brand-new cars that actually automate the voice that says: Bitte zurück bleiben! (Please stay back!). That has to be the one thing missing from the new trains...the authenticity of the Münchener U-Bahn drivers talking in their thick Bayerisch accent. Sometimes they even greet you as you come on the train! Where else does that happen? One more thing to add here is the 2 Way Escalator! Yes, you read that correctly. The escalators go both ways depending on who reaches the escalator first. A motion sensor determines this.



14. Hearing old 80s songs in Kneipen that I almost forgot (more of Germany thing) paired with traditional bayerische Lieder - Most Kneipen (bars) love playing those classic bayerische Hits that everyone knows. Then they bust into Michael Jackson and everyone knows the lyrics...but then they don't know what they mean. What a shame.


15. Dogs can ride the U-Bahn without a leash - The dogs here are unbelievably tame. I see them all the time ride without making any noise. In the states, dogs would definitely misbehave. It would just have to happen that way.



16. XXXXL Me Please! (Everything is big here) - You start with 0.5 Liter beer in your neck of the woods? Here we start with 1.0 Liter. You start with a regular-sized pretzel? Here you start with a gigantic pretzel. It's just taken for granted that everything is super-sized here. München is definitely great for those with big appetites and someone who appreciates hearty portions of whatever they please. No food experience will be quite the same, or drinking experience for that matter.



17. Is China following me? The Chinese are everywhere! - After I arrived here, I noticed immidietely that there are a lot of Chinese people here! I was amazed to hear it on the U-Bahn, in the middle of the city and even in Studentenstadt. Definitely reassuring to know that I haven't lost much, since I can understand what is being said. Ha I guess I'm not losing everything I've learned!



18. Kultur, Kultur, Kultur (Culture x 3) - It's hard to live in München without noticing the crazy amounts of culture around you. For starters, big "Kultur Kultur" round announcement boards are all over the city. They are at every park, outside every subway stop. These boards are covered with posters announcing every cultural event in the city. I don't know what I'm going to do without them back home.